Tag Archives: FET
Game Over
Game Over
Today is 7dp6dt. 13 days passed ovulation. I have been plagued with heartburn the last couple days. And heart palpitations. And the occasional dizziness. And sore boobs. And lots of nausea. And a crazy appetite.And peeing ALL the fucking time. I even had the tell tale change of scent in my lady city, and speaking of scent – I can smell my fridge from here every times it’s opened.
With shaking hands I pee’d on a first response. I snapped on the lid and set it upside down on the bathroom floor. I finished peeing and left to get a good luck sniff of Monkey.
I stared at the bathroom door.
I stared at the little stick.
I reminded myself that I would much rather get a BFN then have another miscarriage.
I reminded myself that I have one fabulous Monkey (who I really wish would nap again.)
I reminded myself that it was only 7dpt and that it was afternoon pee.
Filed under Trying To Breed
Manny Moe Curly
Manny Moe and Curly
Manny, Moe and Curly are on board.Manny and Moe are perfect hatching 6 day blasts. Curly is, as the RE put it, still catching up.
And now we wait. Although I’m pretty sure I’ve already gassed them with my lethal progesterone gas. Good lord. It’s always bad, but this time it really, truly is lethal. So glad the Mr is out of town.
All three defrosted beautifully. The embryologist, a hot french woman came in after the transfer to give me a picture of the embryos and said that Manny and Moe were expanded when frozen, but began hatching immediately upon defrost. This is a very good sign.
I’m torn between wanting to enjoy the illusion that I’m pregnant, and not wanting to think about it at all so that I’m not heartbroken when it doesn’t work.
Filed under Trying To Breed
This is it!
This Is Is
In the immortal words of Michael Jackson; This Is It. I don’t know why my transfers always have musical references, they just do. Last time it was OK-Go.
Actually, I think OK-Go, Here It Goes Again is the anthem of all woman doing transfers, IUIs or a two week wait of any sort. Probably not what they were thinking when they wrote the song and climbed on their treadmills, but there you have it.
This Is It is much better suited this time. Because I have no tubes. really, this is it. If this doesn’t work, there are no more chances.
I guess I’m lucky in that I’m not going to be tortured month in and month out wondering and waiting and hoping. There is no more hope and I can move on to bigger and better things.
What ever those would be.
I’m also so very lucky to have scored an out of the park home run with my very first cycle that brought us Monkey. No matter what happens in the next 10 days, I still have my Monkey.
Filed under Trying To Breed
Houston. We… don’t..? have a problem.
No problems here. Yet.
This morning, despite none of the 42 OPK’s I’ve pee’d on the last five days being positive, I went to my RE for my mid-cycle date with Mr Wandy. I have been having crazy cramps in right ovary for the last 4 or 5 days. My right ovary is the asshole. Every day closer to the wanding brought a higher stress level as I was certain I was going to be cancelled.
As I laid back on the exam table I told the Dr (sometimes refered to as Dr Hottie) that was a lot of ovary cramping and that I was sure I had a cyst. The Dr smiled kindly as if to say… yeah, whatever.
As it turns out? 18mm follie getting ready to go. On the left. Nothing on the right. (Did I mention that my right ovary is an asshole?) And? My thickest lining to date! 12mm!!
So, everything is moving forward.
Filed under Trying To Breed
This is it people!
And now the screaming starts
Tomorrow I turn 43. And, unless something big happens in the next couple of hours, I will not have discovered the real answer to life, the universe and everything. I feel completely let down by Douglas Adams.
Tomorrow I also start my ovulation predictor kits for this final cycle. That’s not totally true. Because I’m a POAS addict, I pee’d on one today.
I am not ovulating.
Yet.
Hopefully, I will get a positive this weekend and everything will move forward as planned. A BFP in a couple weeks would be grand. But seriously, at this point, I’m just ready to be done.
Which totally means I will get a BFP and probably go through the long drawn out hell that will result in a miscarriage just like last time. My body seems to be rather insistent on reaping maximum heart break from this whole process.
Really wish I felt more positive going into this. I know bringing home a baby is a possibility. But so is winning the lottery.
Filed under Trying To Breed
Patience. It’s what I don’t have.
Patience. I gots None.
There is a nasty rumor circulating around Twitter, that I excel at waiting because I didn’t POAS all week. That I am some kind of Buddha-esque blogger lady. Buddha belly? Yes. Buddha patience? Absolutely not.
I feel I need to clear up that rumor.
The last few transfers I would POAS every morning and get more and more depressed with every snow white negative staring up at me. This time I definitely wanted to find out on my own, rather then waiting for the Dr to call with that sad “Well, I don’t have good news.” So, my mom and I decided to take a road trip to Disneyland for a distraction. My Dr said that as long as I didn’t ride any bumpy rides and remembered to take enough down time, that it was fine.
Filed under Issues. We All Have Issues., Trying To Breed
Embryo Transfer: Take Six
pregnant until proven otherwise
This morning I got up, put on my red underwear and headed to the clinic to pick up the embabies. Not sure why I thought it needed to be red… this just seemed to be a good time to bust it out.
It was so very weird going to something like this on my own. Mr is in NYC at a conference and is in the middle of starting a company, so I’m pretty much a start-up widow. He has been working so hard and so many hours on his company that he has nothing left over to worry about ultrasounds and blood work and embryo transfers. Not that he wouldn’t be thrilled if we got a BFP, but, I hate to bother him with all the details of this s(t)inking ship.
Truthfully, he’s so busy in NY working 18 hours a day at a neck break speed (and eating dinner at places like Keens and Les Halles and Carmine’s ((JEALOUS!!))) that I’m not even sure he knows that we have embabies on board.
Filed under Trying To Breed
Ice Ice Babies
Ice Ice Babies
Here we go again. Operation: have a baby.
Although. I’m sorta leaning towards renaming it “Operation Put A Reproductive Endocrinologist’s Kids Through College Because I Can’t Fucking Let Go Of The Idea Of Having Another Baby.”
Or maybe “Oh lookie – we have an extra 3 grand and I have nothing to obsess about so lets see what the local RE is doing next week.”
or… “Fuck. Let’s just get this over with?”
*sigh*
A part of me is thinking that, Fuck Yeah! This is it! This time it will work. This time I’ll get pregnant. It’ll be fine. But the other part, the MUCH bigger part is wondering how it could ever work.
Five 5 and 6 day blasts. We didn’t get that when I was 39 during our first cycle. I should feel like this would give us a great chance at concieving. But instead, I’m pretty sure that whenI show up to the transfer next Saturday, they will realize they have the wrong person.
Filed under Trying To Breed
