Tag Archives: Toddler Madness
My state of mind
My state of mind
I’ve done a great job of keeping myself busy lately. Play dates, and writing about dirty talk and having a new friend over to drink WAY too many delicious Manhattans and talk about sex toys until well passed my bedtime. For the most part I’m just ignoring the upcoming Final Transfer in January. I really don’t expect it to work. I’ve seen too many negatives in the last two years and lost two babies. I just don’t feel like it’s in the cards for me.
And for the most part, at this point, I’m OK with it. I’m lucky that I have Monkey. I’m lucky that I had the three boys when I was a teen – although I was WAY to young and terrified to enjoy them.
Having Monkey stay an only child means that we can afford to give him a better education and travel with him. Having one is easier.
Such hollow words.
Filed under Issues. We All Have Issues., Trying To Breed
Spanking. It’s not just for perverts any more!
Spanking. It's not just for perverts any more!
The first month I was working in the fetish house, I had a client who was so terrified he could barely get the words out. I knew he wanted a spanking from the note next to his booking information, but none of the words that were coming out of his mouth seemed to resemble that word.
“I just, I don’t know…. I’ve been thinking about it for a long time and, oh god what am I doing here? What must you think of me? It’s just such a horrible thing, I’m not sure what to do…. I just think about it all the time… I should just go.”
His mouth was so dry each word seemed to contain extra syllables. The moisture that should have been in his mouth? Dripping from both pits and creating a slick across his palms. I’m not sure he could have turned the door knob had he tried to leave.
The Real Life of a Houseboy
The Real Life of a Houseboy
As a profesional dominatrix, I constantly get asked if I’m in need of a houseboy. 9 times outta 10, this boy is thinking he will be forced to wear panties and clean while I stand over him in full leathers, snapping a whip and occasionally demand he drop his broom to come service me because I’m so damn turned on by watching him clean that I
just
can’t
stand it.
This could not be further from the truth. See, what he’s picturing in his mind? That is what I call a session, and I expect to be paid for it.
Oh. Except the part about him servicing me. That would be fantasy. You know what else is fantasy? A boy with an erection being able to clean.
Not to say I have never had a houseboy, I’ve had several over the years. I’ve been lucky to find loyal clients who I click with and trust, and slowly allow them to serve me in a personal context.
A Fun New Game For The Dungeon
Crash and Burn
When it comes down to it, all the leather, expensive equipment and other formalities aside, clients come to the dungeon to play. To escape reality for a bit. To have a heart bounding (some times ass pounding) good time.
It’s just a different brand of ‘good time‘ then what usually comes to mind.
Submissives like to be put in humiliating situations that result in them being in pain.
They like predicaments in which they can’t come out ahead.
They like the unexpected.
They like to feel their adrenaline pumping.
They love to hear Mistress laugh and know they are the source of her amusement.
So, with this last week of ear infections and late night dashes across the house, I have once again been schooled by my toddler in the ways of the dungeon. I have a new game that NO submissive would ever expect.
I will lead them naked into the middle of the dungeon. (Although, I’m usually in my underwear when I play with Sir Monkey.)
Filed under The Little Monkey, The Spanking Factory
Big Boobies. I haz ‘em.
Big Boobies.
I have always had big boobs. Being a sex worker means that LOOONG before I feed Monkey with these knockers, they put food in my mouth.
I also breastfeed my older three, about 4 million years ago when I was a teen.
This means, that despite my plastic surgeons best work, I have Big Saggy Boobs. Mommy boobs.
I have two sets of bras. The mommy bras that keep things from bouncing too much, the white ones are not so white any more and the darks ones, well, they are not happy either. Let’s just say they have not led the hand wash, line dry life they would have liked.
Then there are the Work Bras. These are the ones from Fredricks of Hollywood that are modern engineering marvels. They lift, they do their best to separate and they give their all to make sure I can’t see my feet.
Filed under The Little Monkey
The Teeth. They are killing me.
The Teeth. They are killing me.
Where have I been you ask. Why no posts for like, a week?
Oh. Holy. Crap. Let me tell you why. I need some sleep, that’s why. I have all kinds of witty things to write about. I’ve all kinds of naughty fun posts peculating in my brain. Why don’t I write them then? You are waiting. I know.
Bring on the sexah!
Well. Here’s the story. Monkey is no longer sleeping. He is teething. It seems to be a full time job. He is fine all day, but then, when the lights go down, he wants me sleeping, on the floor, next to his crib, with my hand shoved through bars of his kennel crib holding his adorable little hand.Any time he wakes and I’m not there, he stands, no, levitates in his crib and screams for me.
Occasionally he does this even though I am asleep next to his crib, I’ve just let my arm slip into a more natural, less hand holdy position.
Filed under Issues. We All Have Issues., The Little Monkey
A day in the life
A Day in the Life
This morning, after about 4 minutes sleep, because someone has decided that sleep training is sooo last year and no longer wants to sleep at all, let alone all night and certainly not for more then 40 minutes at a time… I had a phone session.
Usually I wouldn’t do anything of the sort with the Monkey around, but because this was a regular client and really, all he wanted was for me to listen, and because when Cars is on the TV, Monkey is rendered speechless AND motionless, I agreed.
Because I have been having childcare issues (as everyone who follows me on Twitter got to hear about yesterday), it’s been hard for me to schedule sessions with some of my regulars, so one smart subbie figured out how to entertain me, as well as serve me, without me being all that involved. He booked a session with a male escort and let me listen in.
Filed under The Spanking Factory
Mother Of The Year
Mother of the Year
I can’t believe I won! I guess the defining moment happen just this morning.
Monkey has a cold, so has been forgoing milk for watered down apple juice. And has decided that he only eats apples. And occasionally cashews. But mainly apples. This has given him a bit of a rash on his adorable little bum.
So I’m letting him run around without pants – wearing only his “I’m 100% Awesome” tshirt, because, you know, truth in advertising.
I was fully prepared for him to pee, or even poop on the floor.
What I was not prepared for was for him to drag an old playboy out from WHERE EVER it had been tucked, and come sit next to me. Looking at it. Without his pants on.
Then he went an pee’d on the floor.
Filed under The Little Monkey
Future Fetishist of America
Future Fetishist of America
Today I rode the train into The City for a girlie lunch. As in, two girlies, no toddlers. Last night I could barely sleep with anticipation for you see, I have not actually had a girlie moment out without a client or toddler or anything in… months. Mayhaps years.
My biggest question – What Do Girlies Talk About?! Would I remember how to socialize with a grown up or would I sit across from her in uncomfortable silence staring at her cleavage with nothing to say other then… “did you see that episode of Yo Gabba Gabba where Muno is scared to get on that train?”
I promised myself I would not talk about infertility or work (for yes, she is also a Dominatrix) and I WOULD NOT CRY.
Within the first two seconds of her walking into the restaurant I’m all… “Miscarrige, IVF, Infertility sucks, WAAAAHHH!! Soo.. how’s work.”
FAIL.
I did however manage not to stare at her cleavage OR talk about Yo Gabba Gabba. Too much. Mainly because she was wearing a scarf.
Filed under Issues. We All Have Issues., The Little Monkey
The Unobtainable Goal
yin and yang
Last month I saw a client in the dungeon. I was distant. I was demanding. I gave incomplete orders and teased and tormented him when he could not complete them to my liking. I escalated it. I demanded that these unobtainable goals and demands be met faster. He groveled. He tried. I complained loudly. I called him names. I threw things at him. Every time he got close I changed my mind about what I wanted. At one point I slapped him. He begged for more information. I refused to give it to him. I would tell him I already had given him the information. It didn’t end well for him.
Flash to this morning. Monkey wanted breakfast. But not that breakfast. And he wanted it fast. Actually, he wanted it when he was done playing with his cars. Then he wanted his breakfast again. But not the second one. The first one. But in a different bowl. WHY WASN’T I LISTENING TO HIM!? He tasted his breakfast and decided it was ok. Nope. He changed his mind. It nearly went on the floor. He pointed across the room and is his clearest and most demanding voice said “GUK! GUUUUK!” It did not end well for me.
Filed under The Little Monkey
